September 1st, 2021 - Another move from Praveen's father

 It's been a long time that I updated this blog.

Again, it's the same story. Praveen is always behind Lekshmi and her family. He is still taking care of her and her expenses.

But things changed from my side. My attitude my approach everything changed.

I am no longer nagging behind Praveen asking him or pestering him about his matters. That just almost stopped our fights. And my kids also started thinking if mom doesn't question dad there are no more fights!

The major change in Praveen's side is he is a drunkard now. Started drinking from morning 5:00AM. Many days I have seen him drinking a beer or hot which is kept mixed in the car early morning, as said I behave as if I have never seen such a thing.

A month before Praveen came and told me that his father is starting a business for him and also said that his father said not to inform me.

Frankly speaking, I felt happy for Praveen. He will be engaged and that will sort out many of his personal unnecessary thoughts. But the only mistake I made is I said/warned Praveen not to give this business to that bitch Lekshmi and not to involve her. As avoiding me from this business itself is the first sign of making her come to be a part of it. I know Praveen very well. The most cunning fellow I have ever seen.

As usual, as soon as I echoed her name he started shouting and messing around saying many things, and started quarreling. And he called his father (it seems not sure) and said Suji again creating a scene here.

In the end, Praveen came and said that Praveen's father said not to inform me of any of the progress about the new office.

After that conversation, Praveen is behind as if he needs to hide everything from me. I saw him behaving very indifferently in front of the driver as if I should not know about the office matters. I felt so bad. Maybe he is trying to irritate me. I always run away if he gets in talk over phone or driver why should I be a problem for his official things.

Today was the inauguration, Praveen didn't even say to me about the inauguration. He didn't even say that he is opening the office today or there is pooja. I felt very bad and in fact, it was so painful.

Two days before he was with Lekshmi and he had a good time with her, I can see the happiness on his face. Good for him.

I really don't know what is the role of me in his life why he is treating me like a servent or a caretaker of his house or a money-making machine.

By evening I really felt bad and called Praveen's Mom to say the truth that I didn't come because Praveen said its pappa's wish. And my intuition was correct, Pappa didn't say so. Praveen purposefully played the game to increase the hatred of Praveen's parents with me. He really doesn't want me to maintain a relationship with his parents. The motive being if I ever leave the house, he can easily blame me and his parents will support him.

From my conversation with Praveen's mom I found many things:

1. There is a strong hatred and angry in their mind for me because of Praveen tapping my conversation about Praveen's father.

2. Praveen's mom said 'my character is not good' That clearly is an indication of them saying kindly get away from my son's life.

3. She said I spoiled her son. She is trying to blame me for her son going behind many girls.

4. She clearly doesn't like me calling her about her son. How come??? I really don't understand even after he doing such nasty things they are still accepting their son and blaming me as usual!

I have never asked anything to them. Even this house when they said they will build a house I said I don't want I was known I will be trapped.

Even after I stay away from them still they feel I am not good. I don't understand.

God only knows how I can survive in the midst of these people!

Expectation for 6th March, 2020

I am expecting Praveen's outburst tomorrow.

Maybe not because he may feel guilty

Let me wait for tomorrow.

Praveen in Kozhikode 5th March, 2020

As said Praveen left to Kozhikode by morning 3:00AM. I kept his whatsapp on in my computer.

I also had shared his live location for 8 hours just to confirm whether he is going to Lekshmi's house.

And my guess was true.

He picked Lekshmi by around 4:00AM

I got all his whatsapp message of making Lekshmi ready by 3:30am

Frankly as soon as he left I started crying like hell. I went to my pooja room and started crying like a kid. I begged God for why I am facing all these. Why Praveen is cheating me.

I didnt eat anything till evening. By evening I really thought I might inform Lekshmi's mother about these photos and the relationship of Praveen with Lakshmi is not in good shape if she is not aware of it.

I thought and rethought about the same and by around 9:00PM I courageously sent those pictures from Praveen's whatsapp to Lekshmi's mother's mobile.

It seems she opened those message in 10 minutes I saw a quick 'Hi' message to Praveen's whatsapp. Which made be suspicious if its Lekshmi's mom she will never text a Hi. Being a mother she will definitely become furious and will shout at Praveen for those pictures.

That clearly means it was Lekshmi who say those pictures and informed Praveen instantly.

Praveen brilliantly logged out from his desktop devices.

Surprisingly I was expecting his shouting calls but he didnt do it. May be he is feeling guiltly because I found his whatsapp messages for Lekshmi. Which he never expected would happen.

Whatever!!! I am alone again. I lost my husband. The person whom I loved most in life and really wish him to be back to my life.

I really dont know whether that will happen.

For now Praveen is lying and really want to live for her.

From all those whatsapp chat with her I saw him loving her and caring. I dont see a single word from Lekshmi saying 'Chetta I too love you'

All she wanted is his money and Praveen blindly pouring all his income to her. Dont know why he is doing that.

Praveen Plays About the Naked Picture

Last day 4th of March, 2020 I couldn't resist myself from talking to Praveen.

As always I got up early in the morning and saw Praveen too getting up by around 7:00AM

I made tea for him and sat to talk to him about his relationship with Lekshmi.

As usual, he was very rude and neglected to talk to me about her. He is so addicted with that relationship that he doesn't want to make any compromise.

I told him that I am feeling very lonely without his love and affection.

Its been days that I hacked his iphone and viewing all his whatsapp messages with Lekshmi.

I saw him mentioning me as a bitch and wanted to get rid of me at the earliest because me being a problem for him for his relationship with Lakshmi.

I was so afraid. I wanted to live with him wholeheartedly. I want myself to be his lovely wife. I wanted his love and affection. But it seems he dont like me anymore. He is lying to me. He wants a life of his own.

He doesn't want me to interfere with his other relationship. He says I will pay you for what you need to take care of the kids. Not to expect anything more.

I dont know what that means.

In the evening he said he wil take me to temple. I was waiting for his arrival. By around 7:00pm he took me to temple. while in temple Lekshmi called and said Praveen that someone told about the naked pictures of her and is in many hands. Praveen feels its me who might have sent that pictures to many people.

So he asked me whether I did that. I said yes I did sent that to Lekshmi as well as to Praveen's father.

Praveen warned me that Lekshmi might go to a police station for using her pictures to send to many and that Praveen will be one in problem. He will go to jail because those pictures were taken by Praveen on his camera and the phone which I am using is in his name.

I said if he leaves his relationship with Lekshmi I will leave the story of pictures. He said ok and left.

By 10:00pm he came and said he will no longer have a relationship and I can be happy.

To be very frank I trusted those words. I really thought Praveen is telling that genuinely and will never go to Lekshmi's house. I kissed him and hugged him and said I am really happy for that.

Praveen too behaved normally and those hours gave me lots of pleasures.

By around 12:00AM I saw him texting Lakshmi 'Goodnight Vavae'

It was shocking. That really means he played his dirty stories again!!! I felt so bad. I started crying inside.

By morning 3:00Am he said he is going to Kozhikode to meet few store people for his mundu business.

I felt like crying inside. Totally dead

Praveen's Harsh Words

The day Praveen left to Kodugalloor with Lekshmi, he called me.

He was talking really angry with me, in fact, he doesn't have to. But I have no idea why he called and quarreled with me. He can very well cut the phone and go but he didn't do that instead said many things really bad.

Few things that he said,

1. I am always a pain for him. If I am happy for 5 days next 5 days I am quarrelling with him
2. He never loved me, he is tolerating me for the sake our kids. He said he needed someone to take care of them that's why he is having me in this home.
3. He said he will show all my phone recordings to the respective persons and insult me. He also said nobody got a good impression of me because of my behavior.
4. He can bring different girls every day to his bed. He said he is getting offers every day from different girls to have sex with him.

He thinks he is the perfect gentleman in the whole world in spite of doing all these things.
I really dont understand what is going on in his mind.

Why would a husband record his wife's phone calls and take them to the outer world and show it!
Why he wants to create a bad impression about me?

Why he says that 'He loves me wholeheartedly' after all these things.

Why he is behind Lekshmi? Why he wants to service her and her family?
He says Lekshmi is his vava and needs to take care of her. He buys everything for her. Spends lot of money. Gives her lots of love. What does that mean?

To be frank he is having sexual relationship with that girl too. I see her phone calls from 10:00pm to 3:00am.
I see her naked video calls as well. And that Praveen can't resist himself from going her home for the sake of his physical satisfaction. I can very well understand that.

He is doing this wrong. But he doesn't understand that. I really dont know what to do.

I asked help from everyone but nobody can get me a good solution or help me from this relationship with Praveen.

I am afraid Lekshmi can become pregnant because of Praveen or do abortion which will be a lifelong threaten to my family.

The most painful thing is 'I lost my husband'
The person whom I loved most in my life. whom I considered my everything.
I loved him more than anything in this world.
I always wanted to be with him. When he leaves me my heart breaks. I used to start counting my seconds for his return. All my love and affection were not even considered!

Praveen never loved me that the truth!

Whatsapp Chat with Praveen's Father

I don't know whether I am feeling a positive response after his chat.

All I know is Praveen's father is not happy to involve in this issue and that Praveen made a very bad picture about me to his father as he used to do with everybody,

Basically Praveen is making me feel bad before others dont know for why!!!

What is the reason for all this. He just wants to make his space in others mind by making me a fool before others.

All my fate. Praveen never loved me instead used me for all his personal needs.

How Am I going to survive!

Praveen left to Kodugalloor with Lekshmi

This morning by 6:00Am Praveen left to Kodugalloor. He said he is going with Suresh chettan (the person from Ludiana) and Driver Vijayan.

But the fact is he went with Lekshmi. This morning he picked her from home and went to Kodugalloor.

I was known about this. So I called him and asked whether she is with him as soon as I asked Praveen became violent and started shouting at me.

I asked him to give me a video call. Praveen didn't do that he said it's not necessary to let me know if I dont trust him. The thing is she is with him that's why Praveen doesn't want to give me the call.

I sent a Whatsapp message to Praveen's father informing about his trip with Lekshmi.

I made the call to Udaya Chechi (lekshmi's sister) and Gopan Chettan (Udaya chechi's husband) and I came to know that they are also well aware of this illegal relationship.

It seems Lekshmi and Lekshmi's parents are very strong with their relationship with Praveen for money.

Again Praveen called me and said many things.

1. He said I am not mentally stable and that I am happy for 5 days and not happy for the next 5 days

2. I always question him about his relationship with his friends.
Let me explain this
a. After his drinking habit stopped he used to go to his friend Umesh's office and used to spend time there. He always does all kinds of service to his friend. I found it very odd because he is having no job and doing free service to Umesh. I felt why would someone be freely available and service friends.
I told him to find a job and earn at least to pay the house rent.
He is saying this as a major default of mine

b. Relationship with his school friend Veena. After a lot of chaos with Umesh servicing, he found a new person named Veena. She being his school friend and now a divorcee Praveen used that opportunity for the sake of consoling her and started servicing her. He used to accompany her in all her needs. She is a singer so Praveen started taking her all the programs and showing over freedom towards her in front of others. I felt very odd. Society started murmuring as if Praveen is the new pair of Veena.
Me too didnt like him always planning for her programs and being with her till late night. He also talks to her over phone for hours.
When I started complaining that again became a big problem for Praveen

c. Then comes this girl Lekshmi. He started being with her. He started spending money for this girl. Taking her to gym, swimming, restaurant, shopping, even to beauty parlour.
Being a wife how can I accept this.
Moreover, Lekshmi always touches Praveen's body. She always hugs him and kisses him which I am so angry.

3. Praveen says I always quarrel with him when he goes out. Frankly, I always feel very lonely when Praveen leaves me alone here. Out of my love and affection, I always ask him when he will return. He thinks I am pestering him. If he goes for a job then I am ok but Praveen goes for the sake of others leaving me alone not even caring how I will be here alone. He is least bothered about my security or my needs.

Basically, Praveen said he is tolerating me for the sake of the kids and that he dont love me. For him, I am a pain. He doesn't want to say 'Suji just leave me' because he knows I will catch that word. So he is making me say that.

Praveen said the only person that he should convince is his father and that all others are of no concern for him.

I still dont understand what that means.

I am so tired!!!!
I dont know why Praveen is doing this. Why he is lying?
Why he is so crazy about that girl!!!

God only knows!